The "Less than Perfect" Resume

These classic tidbits were taken from real resumes and cover letters and were printed in the July 21, 1997 issue of Fortune Magazine:

1. "I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience."

2. "I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and spreadsheet progroms."

3. "Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year."

4. "Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave."

5. "Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions."

6. "Failed bar exam with relatively high grades."

7. "It's best for employers that I not work with people."

8. "Let's meet, so you can 'ooh' and 'aah' over my experience."

9. "You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time."

10. "Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details."

11. "I was working for my mom until she decided to move."

12. "Marital status: single. Unmarried. Unengaged. Uninvolved. No commitments."

13. "I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse."

14. "I am loyal to my employer at all costs...Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail."

15. "I have become completely paranoid, trusting completely no one and absolutely nothing."

16. "My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I possess no training in meterology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage."

17. "I procrastinate, especially when the task is unpleasant."

18. "As indicted, I have over five years of analyzing investments."

19. "Personal interests: donating blood. Fourteen gallons so far."

20. "Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store."

21. "Note: Please don't miscontrue my 14 jobs as 'job-hopping'. I have never quit a job."

22. "Marital status: often. Children: various."

23. "Reason for leaving last job: They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 a.m. every morning. Could not work under those conditions."

24. "The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous employers."

25. "Finished eighth in my class of ten."

26. "References: None. I've left a path of destruction behind me."

Ego And The Career!!

An "I am right" attitude imposes a barrier on assimilation of wisdom from others and the environment

The dictionary meaning of ego is "I; self of any person; self esteem". However, "egoistic", means conceit and an exaggerated sense of self!

On a day-to-day basis, we come across various forms of ego -- whether it is at home, on the streets or at the office. However, putting up with someone else's enormous ego for a long period of time can be unbearable!

We often notice other people's ego and blame it for things that can go wrong in our lives. For example, if your boss is egoistic, you hold him responsible for lack of your career advancement. You fault your peers for delaying team effectiveness if they have large egos. And, finally, you accuse subordinates of hampering your efficiency if they have inflexible personalities. But, how many times do we actually introspect and recognise the limitations set by our own ego?

Egos are relative. Your ego maybe small in comparison to some and your self-esteem maybe too high. What is vital is, whether you are allowing your ego to get in the way of your development. This is not easy, especially since it involves making an honest assessment of your pattern of reaction as well as your ability to get past yourself and sacrifice your ideas for the sake of others. The influence of ego on a career can be seen in various forms:

1. Inability to accept your mistakes -
This is the most common result of an exaggerated ego! When we refuse to accept our own follies we think that is because we are right! When others do it, we naturally tend to attribute it to their ego. Step back and judge whether you are being adamant because self-esteem is not letting you acknowledge your own errors. It is not easy to be objective and, at such times, seek help from a colleague or trusted friend to observe whether there is a repeated pattern in your conduct.

2. Inability to see another's point of view -
Even if you claim to have a realistic self- image, consciously put yourself in another person's shoes and reflect. We have a tendency to be intolerant during disagreement and dissent. A sizeable ego only amplifies this and it becomes difficult to incorporate another person's judgement into one's own. Your character traits can be an obstruction in tolerating attitudes and ideas that oppose yours.

3. Inability to work in a team -
The natural fallout of the above is the inability to foster successful teamwork and cultivate team spirit if you cannot get past the sense and love of yourself! Team effectiveness is usually sensitive to the behaviour of its members and leaders. Any display of self- rightousness or arrogance is bound to affect the unit and create an atmosphere of discord with low or no cooperation from its members.

4. Influence on decision making -
Often, the ego gets in the way of gathering views and ideas. Increase in work pace, sometimes forces managers to take instant and independent decisions, getting caught up with constraints and circumstances without accommodating divergent thoughts and feelings. But if one is unable to acknowledge one's inadequacies or lack of capability in some ways, conclusions and judgement can be impaired. Impartial resolution on matters requires one to be open minded and not self centred!

5. Limits learning -
Personality characteristics have a huge influence on one's learning. To gain knowledge from others, it is imperative to study how your individual qualities influence your ability to learn. An "I am right" attitude imposes a barrier on assimilation of wisdom from others and the environment. Be aware of how you let yourself be disadvantaged by your rigidity and inability to admit your shortcomings!

Dealing With An Insecure Boss!!

It is natural for managers to be difficult with their subordinates. Here is how to handle this tactfully

Recently, a senior executive from a large corporation was pointing out the pains of working with a highly egoistic boss. She said, "Since I am performing well and have been noticed by other seniors, my direct boss seems to be threatened by me. He controls everything and doesn't part with pertinent information without difficulty. Nothing I do these days is right for him."

It gets harder to work with someone who is suspicious, distrustful, and difficult to please. Professional life can be made miserable by an insecure or self-absorbed superior.

In day-to-day functioning, it is stifling to be directed by a leader, who is easily threatened. Many CEOs complain about how lack of self-confidence in a supervisor ruins team spirit and erodes organisational culture, not to mention jeopardising productivity.

How many times have you felt that your bosses' weaknesses and gaps have directly impacted you? What manifestations of your supervisor's low self-confidence do you deal with regularly? Do the following ring a bell?

1. Continuous discouragement of your initiatives and very little appreciation of your work.
2. Year on year lame excuses for lack of promotion or low bonus.
3. Public mockery of your ideas, but private appreciation of your abilities.
4. Rejecting your input only to later represent them as his/her idea.
5. Constantly reminding you of your shortcomings and slip-ups.
6. Denying you of the more challenging assignments without giving you the benefit of doubt.

Of course, these are generalised stereotypes and every trait need not necessarily imply a boss lacking in self-esteem or considering you as a potential threat! There should be several other indications to conclude that your manager is sceptically watching you.

1. Diagnose, don't overread -
It is essential not to get carried away by a rebuke or debate and term it "conspiratorial". Make sure you detect whether the hard time you are subjected to is for a personality lapse in your boss and not a genuine correction of blunders.

2. Respond, not react -
In a situation where you feel your boss is behaving immaturely, take a sharper view and respond rationally, not impulsively. Try to ignore the smaller issues and focus on those things that impact you or your professional progress directly.

3. Communicate -
If a situation continues to deteriorate with time, it's a good idea to communicate your discomfort to your manager. It is important for him/her to know that you recognise a pattern and will not stand up for professional unfairness. Dig deeper to understand what emotions and feelings your boss is coming from before you swoop down to get even!

4. Involve others in your work -
If you are being seen as a danger to your supervisor's position, you should make sure that your work and ideas are known to peers / colleagues / subordinates. This way, it does not allow your manager to play foul and gives you alibis or witnesses to your efforts. Build allies so that you do not feel vulnerable and cannot let your superior position you poorly within the team.

5. Other mentors -
Don't rely on your boss being your sole mentor and coach. It is good to have mentors other than your boss, who can guide and help you strategically build your career in an organisation. The mentoring process can get diluted with an advisor playing havoc if he ceases to see you as a protégé and begins to view you as his competitor!

To begin with, the boss-subordinate relationship is a highly tested one. It is almost natural for managers to have negative illusions of their subordinate's intentions. However, when the work environment is made tougher because you are being seen as a risk to your boss' career, then it is better to start appropriately dealing with the differences.